we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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