are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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