I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Is it because I queefed?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
