i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
