I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Randomize
