is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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