If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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