i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
