would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize