is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize