Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
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