? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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