They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
