like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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