was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
