TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
