Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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