we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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