why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
