im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize
