good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Randomize
