How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize