Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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