Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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