dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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