I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
where does the pee come out of this thing
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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