You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
