just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize
