I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
