You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
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