Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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