just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
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