i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
