you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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