You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize