No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
We are two peas in an std pod
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
