This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
