Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize