I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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