I feel like I'm in dance class right now
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize