great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
