No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
