she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
party gras won. party gras always wins.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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