In the future we'll all be gay
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
