we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
You did what with his pubic hair?
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
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