the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
