My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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