So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize