But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
