plz talk dirty to me
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
