At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Your cock deserves a montage
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
