Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
